Erik Ritland
Table of Contents
There have been plenty of great girl bands throughout the years. At their best, they can be empowering and uplifting. Not every girl group is created equal, though. Check out our list of the worst girl bands to discover the gals who missed the mark.
1. Daphne and Celeste
New Jersey duo Daphne and Celeste achieved some success, especially in the U.K., in the early 2000s. They were largely derided, and rightly so. Their cover of Alice Cooper’s “Schools Out” is enough to get them on a worst girl bands list.
2. Loose Chippins
Loose Chippins, who are as awful as their name would suggest, only lasted around three years in the late 90s. In fact, they only released two singles, “Girls Getting Naughty” and “I’ll Be There For You.”
I’ll let you decide which was the party anthem and which was the generic ballad.
3. Buffalo G
Irish duo Buffalo G were no Loose Chippins. They only managed one single, 2000’s “We’re Really Saying Something.” Despite only releasing a single song, Buffalo G makes this list of worst girl bands. And that’s really saying something.
4. Girl Thing
English quintet Girl Thing are like the Spice Girls, only without the charm, hooks, or looks. Consisting of Jodi Albert, Michelle Barber, Anika Bostelaar, Linzi Martin, and Nikki Stuart, this girl band had a career of three years before disbanding.
5. Total
R&B group Total was actually relatively successful, especially when compared to luminaries like Girl Thing and Loose Chippins. They managed to throw together a few more songs than Loose Chippins and Buffalo G combined and even had a minor hit, “Kissin’ You.”
6. Atomic Kitten
UK trio Atomic Kitten are nice enough, they just didn’t do anything to reach out and grab you.
Personally, I don’t think they were ever the same after Kerry Kotona was replaced by Jenny Frost.
7. Alisha’s Attic
Like most on this list, Alisha’s Attic was active in the late 90s and early 2000s. The duo consisted of Shelly McErlaine and Karen Poole, who would actually go on to write for some big names, including Kylie Minogue.
Their three albums are all pretty lackluster, though, thus their place on our list of worst girl bands.
8. Bellefire
If you’re a 40-year-old woman from Ireland, you’ve probably heard of Bellefire. If you’re literally anyone else, you surely just asked yourself, “Who the hell is Bellefire?”
The Irish darlings gained some traction in their home country but were largely ignored by the rest of the world.
9. The Belle Stars
I gotta give it to the Belle Stars: they somehow managed to fit eight gals into a girl group. That’s at least four more than optimal, but still, points for originality.
We finally go a little bit before the 90s with this one, reaching all the way back to the early 1980s. The Belle Stars had one hit, the bland “Sign of the Times,” in 1983.
10. She Moves
American trio She Moves never really got moving, so to speak. Their debut single, “Breaking All the Rules,” broke all the rules of how to make a splash, barely cracking the Billboard Top 40.
11. Zhane
Zhane are basically the textbook definition of a one-hit-wonder. True, “Hey Mr. DJ” is a banger, but they never really lived up to Queen Latifah’s expectations. Or anyone’s.
12. The Pussycat Dolls
Alright, twist my arm, I’ll tell you: I had a huge crush on Nicole Scherzinger when this band was big in the mid-oughts. I certainly did wish that my girlfriend was hot like her.
Anyway, Pussycat Dolls’ songs are so vapid that they even give the girl group genre a bad name. Even Justin Timberlake can’t save them, as you can see here.
13. t.A.T.u.
Let’s face it: t.A.T.u was only famous because they were hot and used to make out all the time. Everywhere. There was a time in 2006 when you couldn’t turn a street corner without seeing t.A.T.u. making out.
Their big breakout hit, “Things You Said,” actually kinda rocks. Like so many of the other worst girl groups, they were never able to follow it up with anything worthwhile.
14. Shampoo
You know how I just said that you couldn’t turn a corner in 2006 without seeing t.A.T.u making out? Similarly, you couldn’t shake a tree in England in the late 90s and early 00s without a terrible girl group falling out. Shampoo is one among many.
The band’s claim to fame is that they were in Mighty Morphine Power Rangers: The Movie. My favorite thing about them, though, is that they have a greatest hits album called Absolute Shampoo. How silly is that?
15. Cleopatra
Cleopatra is one of seemingly 1,000 terrible 90s girl bands with three members. Most of their songs are pretty meh, but they did have one really rad track, “Thank ABBA For the Music.”
16. The Reynold Girls
It’s hard to rip on the Reynolds Girls because, doggone it, the duo is just so wholesome. They had a couple of hits, including “I’d Rather Jack,” which has a music video that’ll just make you want to pinch their cheeks.
17. No Angels
Not content to let the rest of the world hog all the worst girl groups, Germany got into the action with No Angels.
No Angels could have also had many other names: No Hits, No Charisma, No Success…
18. Allure
Allure is one of the rare straight-up 90s R&B groups on this list. They began in 1996 and, sort of incredibly, are still active today.
Their big hit was “All Cried Out,” which climbed all the way to #4 on the Billboard Hot 100. Like all the other extraordinarily ordinary worst girl bands on this list, they never had another hit.
19. Stooshe
We go across the pond (Allure was American) for yet another R&B band, England’s Stooshe. Wikipedia says that they were originally created as an “urban and soulful Spice Girls.” They don’t altogether miss that goal, but that doesn’t say much.
20. The Saturdays
Another more recent entry on our list of worst girl groups, The Saturdays were active from 2007 to 2010. As with most British girl groups, they were only really successful in the U.K., where their debut album Chasing Lights, went platinum.
21. The Cheetah Girls
Formed in 2003, The Cheetah Girls was a four-member group made up of Raven-Symone, Adrienne Balion-Houghton, Kiely Williams, and Sabrina Bryan. Made by Disney for another low-quality Disney Channel movie, this group was doomed from the start. Even though they experienced mild success, this group definitely put out some of the worst music of the early 00s.
Related: 27 Singers Who Started on the Disney Channel
22. Danity Kane
Last on our list of the worst girl bands is Danity Kane, which can’t keep a single lineup to save their career. With a revolving door of members, it’s easy to see why they experienced limited commercial success until they called it quits finally in 2020.
You May Also Enjoy:
Comments
0 comments